Yesterday, today, and an eternity of tomorrows
by JenLin
Summary: At the day of their wedding, Edward gave Bella a letter. For their 5th wedding anniversary, she wants to tell him exactly how she feels, so she writes a letter of her own.
1. Bella

**This story has been in my head for a while. I got inspired by a combination of two things; a fic I read where Bella got a letter before her wedding, and "Halo" by Beyonce (not really a big Beyonce fan, but there's just something about that song...). Be warned, it's all about love and romance, in other words very sweet. If that's not your thing, don't read it. **

**Needless to say, I don't own any of the characters (if I did, I sure wouldn't be here making up romantic E/B-scenes...)**

**Hope you enjoy it!**

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_Edward - my dearest, my love…  
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I was alone - Edward was out hunting with his brothers, and Nessie was spending time with Esme and Rosalie back at the house. I had this moment to myself, and I was going to put it to good use.

It was the day before our fifth wedding anniversary. I knew Edward had plans, but of course he wouldn't let me in on any details. We were going away, just the two of us, that much I knew. I was secretly hoping for a trip back to Isle Esme - we hadn't had the chance to visit it since our honeymoon…

The thought brought me back to the letter at hand. On our wedding day, Edward had given me an amazing gift - one that I still took out, very often. On the outside, it looked very simple - it was just a letter, after all - but I knew it was so much more. In the letter, Edward had told me _everything_ - everything he felt, all his fears and hopes for our future life, memories from our time together… He often told me he loved me, and showed me in every action, too, but still this letter felt special. He had managed to put it all into words, beautiful words that made me cry back then, and still would have, had it been possible.

And now, I was trying to create something similar to present to my husband on our wedding anniversary. I knew I could never be as good with my words as he was, but I still hoped that I could show him even a fraction of what I felt, and make him understand, somehow…

_Do you remember the day we were married? Silly me, of course you do, and much better than I do, I know. I've been thinking a lot about that day lately, and especially about the letter you gave me. I still read it, often. You prove your love to me every day, but I still like to see it all summed up so beautifully in that letter of yours.  
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_I still remember the first time I saw you… I hope you're not still dwelling on what could have happened that day - I don't, I never did. Even after we got to know each other better, you still kept up the strong walls you had built around yourself. I'm glad they finally came down - I know you were still doubting our relationship, us, a long time after you'd let me in, but I never did. I trusted you, long before you learned to trust yourself._

_I told you, that night in the restaurant, that you dazzled me frequently. You always did, and still do. You never believed me when I told you how perfect you were, are - you saw yourself as a monster. I hope your vision of yourself has changed somewhat since that day - I believe it has. I want you to see yourself as what you really are - I knew I didn't get a man the day I married you; I really, truly got an angel.  
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_We've both learned the hard way that we can't live without each other. You are my sun - I have to stand in your light in order to survive, you could say I'm addicted to it. You were always worried about me, even when we were together - you always reminded yourself, and often me, of the risk I was putting myself in, you were putting me in, when I was close to you. I was glad to take that risk - I told you, that first day in the meadow, that I would rather die than stay away from you. It might have been part-joke then, but only in part, and it's been true ever since.  
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_I know you had your fears about changing me, even after you'd agreed to it. Apart from everything else, I know you were afraid that I wouldn't love you anymore, even though you denied it when I asked. I was scared, too. I knew how strong my love was, __**our**__ love was, but I had no way of knowing how I would turn out after the change. But after I opened my eyes for the first time to my new life, and saw you, I felt like I'd been sleeping, and was finally awake. I had always thought you were the most perfect thing on earth, but then, I saw how wrong I had been - you are even more! Seeing you properly for the first time, it was overwhelming - and even though I had thought it impossible until then, I felt our love grow even stronger at that moment._

_As I watch you now, after five years together as husband and wife, I still feel the same way. You dazzle me, your light almost blinds me, and I feel pulled towards it. Our combined love for our daughter makes our bond even stronger - and how I love watching you with her. Our daughter is truly a blessing, one I thought I would never have - as is our love.  
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_You are all that I need, and our love is amazingly strong, as it always has been. I can see your love written in your face every time you look at me, and wherever I am, I can feel you embrace. I am surrounded by your love every moment of my existence. My only hope is that you can feel my love, too - I'm sure you must, since this much love could never be held inside a single body._

_I want to thank you for yesterday, for today, and for an eternity of tomorrows. Never forget or doubt that I love you, as I will love you for the rest of our days - eternity._

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**Reviews would be awesome! But remember, this is only my first try at a Twilight fic (and 2nd try at any fic), so please be nice, if possible!**


	2. Edward

_I finally got the inspiration to write Edward's reaction to the letter. As usual, I was inspired by a song, this time "Wait till you see my smile" by Alicia Keys. I hope you like it!_

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I sat in an armchair in front of the fireplace with my wife curled up in my arms. We were quiet, both watching the flames dance, enjoying the calm of the moment. I had guessed she'd wanted to go back to Isle Esme for our fifth wedding anniversary, but I had made different plans – a trip up north, to one of our cabins that she hadn't visited before, but that I knew she would love.

We had driven up in the morning, and since we arrived, we hadn't left the house once. Most of the time had been spent in bed or curled up in front of the fire, enjoying each other and being alone this far away from everything and everyone.

An hour or so earlier, we had placed ourselves in the armchair in front of the fireplace. I think Bella liked having a fire out of old habit, even though she didn't feel the cold anymore, and I could spend hours staring into the flames – it was soothing, somehow. Before placing herself in my arms, my wife had fetched a letter from her bag, and given it to me with the instructions not to say anything, just read it. "But what's in it?" I'd wanted to know. "Everything", was her enigmatic reply. I was a little surprised, and not sure why she'd felt the need to write a letter. Her intentions soon became clear, however, when I started to read. I understood how she'd wanted to give me something to keep, like the letter I had given her on our wedding day, the one she referred to in her own letter. I also understood that she found it easier to explain herself in writing, when she had time to think about her words and get them just right. And that's exactly what they were – just right. She had managed to pour so much love into a simple letter. The letter really said everything.

She had told me these things before, of course: how much she loved me, how she had never been afraid I'd hurt her, how she wanted to share eternity with me. I had always believed her, or at least believed that she meant what she said. I, on the other hand, had had my doubts for a long time. At first there was the fear of hurting her, and then of sentencing her to an eternity as a soulless monster. Slowly, she had made me see sense, and in the end the decision had been taken out of my hands anyway. And even though the details surrounding her change had been awful – after all, for a moment I had been certain I would lose her – it took away some of the blame I would have put on myself for changing her. Of course I had been blaming myself for being so careless as to get her pregnant, but I couldn't feel bad about that after the first time I laid eyes on our beautiful daughter.

I had slowly come to realize that of all the things that had happened, nothing I'd done had harmed my Bella in any permanent way or beyond repair. I knew I had hurt her, but I had come to understand, through her endless repetition, that I had been forgiven, and that she understood my motives and the reasoning behind my actions when I left.

My thoughts went back to our wedding day. I had been standing at the end of the aisle with my father. There had been so many people there, all looking curiously at me. Among the friendly thoughts of our family and friends, I could also hear many who were thinking it was a stupid thing to do, getting married that young. Several people were sure Bella was pregnant, and that that was the only reason for it all. People were speculating on the circumstances leading up to the wedding, either quietly in their head, or in some cases, whispering to the person sitting next to them. But they were talking about things they knew nothing about. I heard some outright mean thoughts and gossip – people saying this would never last. Some seemed happy enough to discuss in low whispers what might go wrong, or how long our marriage would last.

The second Bella stepped into view, however, all criticism – both spoken and quiet – went silent. Everybody was in awe at how amazing my Bella looked. I knew she'd been nervous, but now I saw her smile. She looked beautiful, and strong, and I knew she didn't need these people who were just there to gossip about her, she didn't care what they thought anymore. She was ready – not just for the wedding, but for whatever came after. Her eyes found mine, and at seeing the big smile on my face, her own smile widened, and she started to walk towards me.

I came back from my thoughts and looked down into the golden eyes of my wife. She had been silently taking in my changing expressions. I stared into her eyes, and found everything I needed in them. For the past few years, she had done her utmost to work against my pessimistic nature, and my habit of blaming everything on myself. Slowly, she had managed to get me to come out of my shell, and to realize that I could not be to blame for everything. She had silenced several of my doubts, but I still felt bad about some things in our past, even though I never spoke to her about them. I was sure she had guessed, though, because she seemed to point them all out in her letter. And when I reconsidered her beautiful, loving words, all of which I knew she truly meant, I felt the last of the guilt lift off my shoulders. She had made a choice, and she had always been willing to take the consequences. What did I have to feel guilty about, when all had turned out so well? We had faced misfortunes, and come out at the other end, stronger than before. We had a family, our beautiful daughter, and most importantly, we had each other. I wanted to tell her about the new insights I'd suddenly had, about the feelings and memories her letter had awoken in me, and how very much I loved her. So I did.


End file.
